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Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Desperate, Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe


DesperateHope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe

By Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson
Published by Thomas Nelson

I do remember. As I sit in my cozy chair, computer on my lap, quiet home, hot coffee and the promise of a day filled with the adventures of my two older boys. I remember.

The early times. When they were younger. When I didn’t know. When everything was new. And a friend came alongside to help me. At first it was my best girl friend, I’d drive to her house, hand her my crying son, or sometimes just park and point to the car seat as I fell onto her couch asleep before I found horizontal.

The Lord has brought me friends and mentors and mentors who became my best friends at each point of my journey. Now, 15 years into being a mom, some days I forget how the very fiber of my life depended on those couch moments. 

Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson had a similar relationship.  I already loved Sally, and met Sarah Mae through this book. Through Sally’s writings, she has already been one of my mentors. Through the power and connection of Social Media, I feel closer to her as I see her life on Facebook and send messages.  This book is open and transparent. Each writer a public figure – sharing their shortcomings and victories in mother hood.  I’d say this is targeted to the younger moms -

I would say that, but I couldn’t. As much as this is an encouragement to those new moms, it pulls out a desire, a motherly obligation, to realize I am now at the stage of helping those younger moms. This book may give you a calling to become that mentor they so need. 

I have been a bit hesitant to swap roles, my youngest is 12. I’m not sure how they will turn out and what sort of credentials or right I have to breathe into another’s home and family. However, I don’t have to be a fix it counselor with all of the right advice. I could just be the mom who steps in for an hour to watch the kids while mom naps. Or the mom who plays games with the kids at the park, or the mom who helps a small child with their math home work with a smile on days that their mom is exhausted.

I actually read this book some time ago, joined a FB support group going through the book chapter by chapter and have made changes in my life because of the calling I have felt. I participated in a New To Homeschool gathering at the local Library, Got involved with our weekly mom meet up on Tuesdays and have tried to have an ear open for those moms who need an extra hand around town. I have been praying that my home may be warm and welcoming to anyone who stops by and needs a rest and retreat.

No matter where you are on this journey of motherhood, I urge you to read this book, pray about your role in the community of believers and pre-believers – and take at least a small step at either reaching out and accepting help or lending a comforting ear or helping hand.  I couldn’t help but covet the time that Sarah Mae got to spend with Sally over tea and some flowers.  But then a flood of images of those who have been there for me comforted and took the coveting away and replaced it with thankfulness.

Book Description, From the Publisher:

"I just can't be a mother today."

These words have been whispered to God in quiet desperation by mothers who love their children to the depths of their soul, but who are struggling with how hard motherhood is.

Motherhood turns you inside out. Sometimes you feel overwhelmed by how tired you feel; the days go on and on, and you want to be a "good" mom, but you feel like a failure so much of the time. What happened to all your ideals? When did you end up feeling so...lost?

Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson have been to the edge and back. Desperate is the story of one young mother’s trials and one experienced mentor’s priceless exhortations. Desperate is not a book about despair, nor is it a rule-laden mothering manual. It is a bouquet from a friend who has been there, reminding us that we are not alone. Sarah Mae’s unvarnished account of her own struggles mothering three feisty young children is a lesson in learning patience, loving idiosyncrasies, accepting help, and—most of all—leaning on God.

Each chapter includes a brief Bible study with journal exercises to help you find your own quiet center, and get you back into the fray soul-filled and refreshed. Written with candor, empathy, and faith, Desperate is like coffee with a trusted girlfriend; one who knows how hard being a mother can be, and how to navigate the often turbulent road.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com <http://BookSneeze®.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255.

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